I'm sorry

Help me
I'm lost
I know you're here
But I feel so alone
I know you care
But I feel so much pain
My throat feels swollen
I cant speak
My heart feels broken
I'm numb
You didn't do anything
But in my head
In my mind
You're leaving
You're gone
I cant live with that
The fear is to much
My heart stops beating
I die
On the inside
My thoughts run wild
My mind hides in the dark
These tears
Streaming down my face
They arent your fault
Its mine
Im sorry
I shouldn't be
This scared
I shouldnt worry this much
Trust
I need to believe what you say is true
I try
I do
Please believe me
Im sorry I do this to you
Its not you I swear
Im so far gone
But I try
Cant you see
I try for you
But who am I trying to convince
You
Or
Myself
I try
So hard
I know you love me
Why is it so hard to believe
Its not your fault
Its mine
Im sorry
Im sorry
Im sorry
Can you see how bad this hurts
Can you feel the unnecessary pain I feel
Make it stop
I can't make it stop
I can't make it stop
I can't make it stop
I feel like
I'm losing control
Help me
Please
I dont want to lose control
Im sorry
You don't deserve this
Please
I love you

Why cant I stay angry at you
For longer then I do
Why do I laugh
When all I want to do is cry
Why can't I help myself
When it comes to you
My heart beaks
Over and over
My mind runs crazy
Trying to find
An answer
Do I stay
Do I go
Someone tell me
I'm not over reacting
When you lie
I told you
This was it
But you make a joke
You smile at me
And
And...
Damnit
I can't
What is this
A cage
Chains I can't see
I don't want to leave
But even if I did
Could I
If you would let me go
Could I walk out
The door
No
No...
I couldn't
If this is love
Why does it have to be
So confusing
What do I do
Is this meant to be
Should I stay
What if
It's not
But I do
What if
It is
And I don't
I feel
Like my heart
Is going
To explode

All in my Head

Im not being
Over dramatic
This is just how I feel
You dont
Know me
This is really real
It's not all in
My head
Actually it is
Part of me
Feels dead
Dont tell me
Not to cry
If you dont know
Why I'm crying
You cant tell me
I'm over reacting
When you cant
See inside my head
You dont know
The demons I face
Alone
Because you can't
Help me
When you dont
See a problem
I try to explain
To you
But that
Backfires as well
What can I do
To escape this
Living hell